By Terry Ott

You won't have Ott to kick around anymore.





And so, as it eventually must for all of us, bedtime must also come for your dear correspondent, AKA THE 4th BEST BEATLE BLOGGER, ever, as selected by The London Times in 2006. Or was it 2005? No matter, for the world shall not long remember wot we wank, here.
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And as you would also know, once is never enough, but 1000 for damn sure surely, is. Hello, goodbye, and get lost. All 'tings must pass, etc., and of course, et al on shitty wind-ey roads.
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As I leave, let me say, that's an example I think all of us should remember. It must always sustain us because greatness comes not when things go good for you, but greatness comes when you have been tested, but only bested, 3 times.
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Yet olde Bloggers never die, they just, fucking fade away. So here, there and fore, my final thoughts, if you can call them that, even.
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THINGS I WILL MISS: Firstly, my loyal readers, some of whom-including me Mum-are pictured nicely at left, and others, now institutionalized.
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They hath sustained me throughout the wrath of insane Internet imbeciles, but especially me Mum, who has wet-nursed me through it fookin' all with nary a serious reproach, even despite occasional, cocky, colonist cheek, and badly bizarre writing. Maybe even just bad, period. Yet, she always encouraged me, unconditionally. Wot a fab, gear, gal!
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Other notables who can't and shan't be forgotten are "Cleveland" Matty Slys, perhaps one of the most knowledgeable non-Baby Boomer Beatle fans around, the very goode Reverend Greg who sent me neat stuff (see bottom), and despite being a Mets fan, has not taken his own life, Mitch Axelrod, the Beatle-toon guy who likewise sent me great shit, and actually also has fucking sense of humour, "Hawaii" Ann and "Dallas" Barb, who despite being real Beatlemaniacs still talk to me, and everyone else who(m) I can't recall due to tea and lack of sympathy. Even Gotham Johnny, who I never hear from no more, but also once was a good friend of BB.
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THINGS I WILL NOT FUCKIN' MISS: Coach Coward's coquettish correctness cowerings and the fucking lunatic Macca Madhatters. Oh, and Francie, of the mental health team, too. Good bloody riddance to the above and all other narcissistic morons, mealy-mouthed motherfuckers, Beatle blowhard-on's, and weasels and wankers who dwell in a sad and sick humourless fantasy of yeah, yeah, yeah; help, I need somebody. What they really need is psychiatric help bad, actually.(This is for you, booger-brains:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1NAwlepnSs&feature=related)
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And so otherwise, we leave with high hopes, in good spirits, and with deep humility, with very much gratefulness in our hearts, and tea in our bleedin' 'eads, but no earnings.
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So, finally, I remind you'se to always give your best; never get discouraged; never be petty. Always remember others may hate you, but those who hate you don't win unless you hate them, and then you destroy yourself.
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Thank you very much. And that's showbiz! http://umrkmedia.com/botr.mp3 (Be patient, BOTR, multi-track!)
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FINAL BONUS:http://www.boomermediareview.com/FreeForeverDVDbox.html

BB Sez: Thank God for UK music mags and madness!!!






As we get ready to wind this slippery sucker up, we have a short moment to reflect on a geezer's laziness, and how to get 'round it-sort of.
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Coming to from my usual week-end tea bender is bad enough, but to regain consciousness after the anual, infamous, X-Mas melt-down is near Herculean. Spent a lot of time in the loo, and dis, dat, and da the udder 'ting that I shan't bore you with.
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So theirily I shall rely this historic 998th post on others who have been OCD-enough to continue to come up with stuff-some of it even maybe readable-on the Beatle boys.
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First up, is jest some groovy images nicked from the Jan. ish of MOJO, which features a nice little feature on foreign Fabs' album and picture sleeve art, et al.
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At least certainly close to interesting, it is.
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BUT, the BIG nooze is the Dec. 28/2008 piece in the NYTimes by music -mensch Allan Kozinn, the noted Beatle and classical music writer, plus a noted bon vi vant about mid-towne. As so noted at left, via click-click. (Tea smudges, OK.)
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Allan's ample ammunition for an attack on Apple/Rutle Corpses for fucking up the expected '08 reamsters release, is of the laser guided smart bomb kind.
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It's one thing for a tea-soaked Internet/Blogging lunatic like your 4th Best to rant and rave about the corpulent Corpse cunts, but quite another thing altogether to have a journo of Kozinn's stature, and a paper like the venerable Times do a number on the bloody beasty wankers.
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Why did it take so long for the no-BS AK to boldly bustervessel?
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Not to assume, and make an ass of you, and me, but perhaps with some of the olde guard at Rutle Corpses counting their lucre on the other side of this life, Kozinn (maybe) felt that for those those that refuse to (release the) rock, now, well fuck you'se/they.
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Whichever, it was well overdue, and maybe-but somehow I doubt it-the fan-deaf arseholes at Apple/Rutles Corpses may sniff the rare air around their palatial estates-and the Dakota-and damn well FUCKING SMARTEN UP before it is too late, and no one will FUCKING care!!!!!!! Dick-heads.
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BONUS!
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Jimi 40 years ago, today!!
http://www.boomermediareview.com/JimiEL40thCD/DVD.html
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DOUBLE BONUS!!
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Heathen Mare's new scare!!!
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1102315/Heather-Millss-nanny-sues-sex-discrimination-forced-naked-spray-tans.html
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FINAL BONUS!
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If this is un-edited, or even really John's voice for that matter, I will quit tea. A craven joke.
http://www.newsoftheworld.co.uk/news/112142/John-Lennon-is-back-from-the-dead.html

BB Sez: FUCK ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





As the Rev. Jim Jones used to mutter, "Mother, Mother, Mother..."
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Are you actually telling me that the best the fuckers at Apple/Rutle Corpses can up with at X-Mas is a FUCKING wank-spank CD signing by the ever dopey Dirk McQuickly????
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Apparently bloody so, as me Mum sent the outrage along and then I bloody regurgitated into my Teutonic tea.
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Oh well, or oi vey, those rotton furity, retards are beyond redemption, I fear, as well as beyond the slings and arrows of vitriolic vicissitudes.
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In their stockings this year, I very much wish a lump of sticky, steaming shit.
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Still, we shall be merciful as this is, after all, Christmas (is) time here again.
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Your nuts roasting on an open fire of debt, bill collectors nipping at your foreclose.
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Silent night, holy night, best night of the year to rip you'se off!
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Yet, there was a day-it seems like a thousand centuries ago, now-
that us Fab lovers would gather round our tree to discover,
Beatles '65, Rubber Soul and even MMT, but now? SWEET FUCK
ALL!!!
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Would it not be great if we could borrow Santie's bleedin' rain dears for a day and have them kick their hooves up Apple's arse?
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Cor, YES, said the 4th Best!
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I know, I know; you can call me an acedia-head-look it up, you sods!-but I shan't apologize for being an nihilistic realist, approx.
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For instance, when I seen my first Clint Westwood flick way back in '66, I knew that no way was he a Fascist, but rather, a frustrated Beatle fan!!
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So yes, this is the universal (soldier) zeit geese.
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However, amongst all this crap there is some-not much, but some-hope, or as Sigmoid Fruit once called turning "hysterical misery into ordinary unhappiness."
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Chastity has put out this day her annual full page in the NYTimes.
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Most of it, regular peeps can't read, but wot the 'ell, eh? It's the thought that fuckin' matters, I guess.
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So, I am off now for the traditional week-long X-Mas tea-bender, and then we shall wind this sucker up around Jan.1. Meanwhile, I shall be in my compound, here, where no one-at least locals-eats dark yellow snow.http://www.johndee.com/ncn/tughill_ncn.htm AND, being cared for by my private nurse/PA: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ee2_0PQqlzc&feature=related
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But, dear friend(s) till then, have a Z-therapy-look it up, again!- larf-or two-on me:
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gvXh2hkLglI
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hihoDlFBNpg&feature=related
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X-MAS BONUS!!
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BOTTLE ROCKET!!!
http://www.boomermediareview.com/BottleRocketDVD.html

BB Sez: I wanna fookin' divorce!






To nick a line-or two-from the late, great, Stig O'Hara, sunrise don't last no all mornin', and a cloud burst...er, something or other. (Look it up.) Oh yeah; all thing(s) must fuckin' pass, away! Some day.
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The point being, you'se see, no, I don't resent performing for you (fuckers) and I don't want you to get fucked-although yes, I ain't your fucking parents-but i AM weery of the grind and it is hightime I went and got lost. (3 cheers, some bastards and weasels and wanks, say.)
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Now, don't me wronged; I have mostly very much'd enjoyed cyber-intercoursing with you for the past 5+ years, yet my ultimate goal of going out on a-hopefully-high note with an aural autopsy of the reamsters, shall not come to pass, perhaps in my lifetime. An (in)effective sewage system, if you will, has seen to that. But, we do have fucking Beet-tull Monopoly!
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No, I shan't reproach any of you fine fans for the above, for it is the bloody cash cow cunts at Apple/Rutles Corpses who no not wot they do, not salt of the earth like you and I. (Well at least you, as I remain, indolently incorrigible.)
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When a (former) fetid fruity friend of mine suggested I start this here thang way, way, way back in October 2003, the Beatle
future looked OH so bright, so, well, how could any self-loathing PTSD'd Internet-based scribbler say no?!!!!
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After all, there is only so much tea one can consume, and doing this thing 2, 3, 4, even 5 times a week sometimes usually kept me occupied and immortalized as the 4th BEST BEATLE BLOGGER, like, ever. Of course though, I am far too modest to mention it, at all. (London Times, October 2005, in one of their best features, ever) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ijFDkpNma-k
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So, today is a day for quiet condamnation, and I shall leave the real heavy attacks-and even something relevant- for #1000, which will drop sometime in the next two weeks, or so.
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But suffice to say, 1K, will contain some fun score-settling, in the wacky world of all things Fab!
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BONUS!
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Dirk, dumb, again:http://www.anorak.co.uk/celebrities/198157.html#more-198157
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DOUBLE BONUS!!!
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The 4th Best's Gotta Brand New Bag!!!
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http://www.boomermediareview.com/JamesBrown60s.html
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FINAL BONUS!!!
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BUSH DOG FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
http://www.sockandawe.com/

BB Sez: Pussy galore!!!




I so desperately wanted to lead with, BUSH, DOG, but since this is not-not really, anyway-a political Blog, I had to try to satisfy my hurting with what one fat, fag Webmeister once complained about as "Heather's genitalia." (Oh my dude, who ever could that be??)
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Any fucking ways, I had almost decided to not bother with 995 today, but then fellow Philistine Peppermint Patty offered up some too good to waste, sheit, and well, where we are all together then, now.
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To wit; wither where now, Heathen Mare Millstone????
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Of course we all miss(ed) her, and wish she would make the rounds like any viral defect to once again amuse and confuse us.
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For instance, has he had her titties upgraded? Trimmed 'er bush?
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Inquiring sick minds need to know!!!
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Does she still enjoy a good spanking? -

Whip(ed) and cream?
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Great Danes?
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Wearing Zebra, which anyone knows is an endangered fucking species!!! -
Alas, perhaps she shan't know, but here's this, to keep one amused:
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ybGYkJf4OCA
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xT9Vi91rS4I&feature=related
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E58vLogEcV8
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Got an e from a JD Valk who had this to pass along:

"McCartney's latest claim: 'I arranged Lennon's conception and birth
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By Rita Skeeter, PROBE Magazine
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Rather than jump-starting the promotion of his new album after lamenting that he left his name off it, Paul McCartney told Probe Magazine another stunning tale that shows that he did and thought of everything before John Lennon did.
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Phoning us up from the 7th level of consciousness, McCartney revealed that he arranged for the existence of John Lennon via a dramatic alteration of the universe’s timeline ‘as a bit of a lark’ and ‘to piss off George [Harrison].’
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According to the cute Beatle, Paul became the most acclaimed artist in every medium imaginable in the universe’s original timeline. This was achieved without ever collaborating with another human being in any way. "It was fun and all, but I thought if I had to do it over again, I’d allow my talent to be shared with someone else."
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Macca got his chance in the original 2009, when his idea for a personal time machine was made into a reality by Stark Industries. Immediately after going back in time, McCartney made sure his school-aged self befriended his bus-mate George Harrison, whose band the Liverpuds had created infectious melodies and constituted the only remote threat to McCartney’s chart supremacy.
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In the new alternate reality, the Paul/George group Chutney featured soaring harmonies and sales but bitter resentments, as Harrison objected to McCartney’s twiddling with the space/time continuum, which George discovered during an extended astral projection ironically arranged by Paul, who had mastered the skill and introduced it to Harrison.
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Fearing that he might never be just a member of a group dedicated to making beautiful, creative, and inspiring music, McCartney endeavored to find a way to have another collaborator but keep Harrison in the group and allow his talent toflower in a separate but equal way. ("And yeah, if he didn’t exactly make with the hits right out of the box and got sore about it, it serves him right since I was the top banana the first time around!" asserted Paul.)
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Macca found the answer in an unlikely place: Freddie Lennon? He was a nice wise-cracking gent who drove me van and buffed me shoes in both realities, and I thought he ought to be part of my next crack at this." Macca traveled back once more with whiskey bottles and perforated condoms at the ready, and this brainstorm yielded the beloved John Lennon.
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His is the alternate universe we currently exist in, and a disagreement with Lew Grade and Michael Jackson led to the destruction of McCartney’s time machine, which apparently will be the last one. ("I took a few tokes too many to remember how to do another one," Macca admits.) -
Left without his history-changing device, McCartney is left with autobiographies and magazine articles to re-shape history as we know it to the history he knows. "This is the main reason I want some Lennon/McCartney songs to be McCartney/Lennon. I know it doesn’t actually change a thing since the writing credits remain equal regardless whose name is first, but changes like this 40 years after the fact are important to me.
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And now that you know that I did everything before John, maybe you’ll talk nice about me!" When asked if he’ll ever stop tweaking his legacy, Paul claimed that "I will if she will!" Asked if he had anything else to say about Yoko Ono, Paul left us with this: "At least I’m not the one stuck with her the third time around!"
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AND, this to say to the 4th Best"
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"I'se a long-time reader of yer blog and a fan of all four fabs including Dirk, but his attempt to re-write history in the way that he feels Yoko had succeeded in doing it reached a new level of pain with the spin on who became political first. I mean, just admit that you wanted to keep politics and the group separate, and keep your self-respect!"
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Thanks JD!!
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BONUS!
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Stop! POLICE!!!
http://www.boomermediareview.com/PoliceCertDVD.html
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DOUBLE BONUS:
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What's in a name? Apparently quite a fucking lot!!!
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081217/ap_on_fe_st/odd_hitler_cake

BBSez: Surprisingly, refreshingly, worthwhile!

With Apple/Rutle Corpses flooding the holiday market with piles of trinket trash-BUT STILL NO NEW OLD MUSIC-a 4th Best Beatle Blogger might get a scintilla of skepticism about any new non-musical offering and therefore say a fucking hex on all the money changers.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U1y9BIjTSVk
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Yet here we have a new video of the Lads mucking about with the '67

Magical Mystery Tour, and although there is no Beatle music, nor footage from the actual MMT movies-mostly news and private footage- this 90 minute video with 20 minutes of bonus material is actually worth picking up. Actually.
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We hear from: film narrator and "presenter" Victor Spinetti, Dirk McQuickly's hurting unit brother, Mike Gearbox, Tony Barrow, and our very own Tone, Bramwell, among a cast of less than half a dozen.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=clkX-x5UOK8
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Without giving away too much, Spinetti has some great reminisces of working with the boys, including once at the Help! premiere in London, when fans crushed the Beatles limo and John Lennon commented, "Push Paul out first, he's the prettiest."
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Also of note is location footage of the New Quay area of western
coastal England where much of MMT was shot, as well as various fans' reminisce of, as the Limies call 'em, "beet-ulls."
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As Spinetti says of the era, it "was good times, with hope in the air." Ah yes, hope; wot's that then now?????
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wxrWz9XVvls
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PLEASE DIRK, FUCK OFF!!!
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Thanks once again to fellow drooler and raver Peppermint Patty who sent along news of more steaming skatole-look it up-from the daft motor mouth of one, Dirk McQuickly.
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This guy is getting better at putting a loafer in the gob than just about any comparative star. PP sez Dirk may be "senile."
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So now, Dirk's up to his (old) tricks of trying to sell himself as the first "political" Beatle.http://www.merriam-webster.com/cgi-bin/audio.pl?shit0002.wav=shit
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Yeah, right, spunker.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/celebritynews/3743977/Sir-Paul-McCartney-I-politicised-the-Beatles.html
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BONUS!
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GONZO!!!
http://www.boomermediareview.com/GONZO.html